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Sunday 30 June 2013

UNREGISTERED SIMS TO BE DISCONNECTED.

















The Nigerian Communications Commission (NCC) has threatened to disconnect all unregistered SIMs from today. Since 2011, they had in conjunction with Telecom Operators in Nigeria, embarked on collation, harmonization, and authentication of all subscriber identification modules. This was intended to effectively monitor telecommunications activities nation-wide, and thereby cut down on phone-related crimes also.

  • Dis na serious wahala for those living abroad o...you go just land Nigeria, and your fone go make 'hoooooo'. No show. 
  • Even sef dat registration exercise no work 100%, cos Naija people dey sabi bend rules too much. Some people sef use dem house boys to go register d damn tin. Abi wettin concern big man with siddon for inside sun dey register wettin? Abegii 4getii. And again how many people give dem real address sef? Did the telecom companies verify any addresses? Make una dey deceive una selves. there.
  • On d bright side, if it can be used to quell phone crimes, then it will be great. Bcos all dis yeye kidnappers..na cell fones sim card dem dey buy off the street to conduct their dastardly act, after which dem go throway am.

TWO VEILED WOMEN CONCEAL ASSAULT WEAPONS IN MAIDUGURI.













A Youth Vigilante Group in Maiduguri have arrested two veiled women attempting to smuggle assault weapons into their Sunday market. They were nabbed at the Bulabulin entrance gate to the market, concealing two AK47 rifles, two pistols, and IED (Improvised Explosive Devise).
The government JTF (Joint Task Force) is investigating the matter.

  • Waooo. Dis na case of 'Saved by d bell'. I don tok am before say dis Boko-Nonsense people go soon start dey use their wives and sisters to blow us up. Those innocent looking 'yarinyans'...all na lie lie.
  • JTF...se una don see now? Make una start dey search d pata (pant) of their women one by one o. We no fit trust dem from here to there. Enemies of progress.
  • And den..Oga Jonna (Jonathan) come dey say him wan release their women wey dey for detention!!! How naive can you be?  I hope he is hearing dis news. Even sef their men don begin dress like women.






JAIL BREAK IN AKURE PRISON!!!
















There has been a jail break in the Olokuta Medium Security Prison in Akure, Ondo State, where about 175 inmates were brazenly released by unknown gunmen who attacked the prison with explosives and guns. The attackers were said to have taken their time to take a Roll-Call of those intended to be released. Police is investigating the matter.

  • Awon janduku...omota. Dis no be Boko Haram o. 
  • Dis is partly ineptitude on the part of d State Government. Where una Prison Warders go when dis happened? I bet dey fled into the bush. Also i wont be surprised if dey even collected money and assisted the process.
  • Even sef, how old is dis prison? It was probably set up in d colonial days to cage black resistance. Dem never reinforce d building since dat time. I sure say na mud dem take build am sef. Dem no even need dynamite to break jail. So what are we talking?
  • D wan wey go pain me pass be say awa government nogo get their acts together and re-arrest dis guys promptly. We no kuku get criminal data-base. So if dem escape to Lagos or neighbouring Edo State...na 'yours truly' (permanent freedom) be dat. It will be business as usual for murderers and robbers. Na d average Nigerian go suffer am.
  • When we go learn???








SENATOR PIUS EWHERIDO IS DEAD.

















The death has been announced of Senator Pius Ewherido, representing Delta Central Senatorial District. Rumour has it that his death was as a result of some spiritual attack by persons bent on eliminating him before the 2015 General Elections. He was said to have been rushed to National Hospital, Abuja, three days ago, after answering a mysterious phone call that made him slump, with blood gushing out of his mouth and ears. Sources say he was billed as a potential Governorship candidate in 2015, under the newly formed APC (All Progressives Congress).

  • RIP, bro...  But why politicians dey drop dead like flies every time sef? Big man big trouble!!!
  • If dem check well dem go see say na heart attack (high blood pressure) kill am. But for awa naija, everytin na so so 'jazzz' (juju). Una too dey busy chasing 'ego', and hardly check una blood pressure.
  • What a shame. Maybe his Senator colleagues will now vote for a 'National Health Service' for Nigeria, before dem all drop dead finish. You can imagine wettin poor man dey take eye see for dat country wey hospital no go treat you for emergency unless you drop money.
  • D allowances wey Senators dem dey receive every day go fit fix awa Health sector if dem dey serious.

THOMPSON OLIHA IS DEAD.






















Former Super Eagles player, Thompson Oliha is dead. He was a midfielder in his days, and played for clubs in Africa, and Europe before incessant injuries marred his career. Before his death, he was a football coach at the Kwara State Football Academy, in Ilorin. He now joins the likes of Uche Okafor, and Rashidi Yekini in demise.

  • Another one gone too soon...RIP ma broda from Bedel. You are an unsung  national hero.
  • I hope the Fed Govt will give his family d house wey dat Abacha (abasha man) promise Super Eagles for winning Tunisia 1994 Nations Cup. 
  • Naija leaders...una no dey shame. Na so so promise una go dey promise for public, and yet fail to perform...small small tasks. Dat is small tin compared to d big big houses wey una dey commandeer for Asokoro, Ikoyi and VI. 
  • Death is d only constant variable in awa lives...weda you chop money o...abi you no even see ordinary garri chop...once you 'peke' for ground..ee don finish be dat.

PROPHET OLABAYO PREDICTS DOOM FOR NIGERIA.
















Prophet Theophilus Olabayo, Primate of the Evagenlical Church of Yaweh, has predicted that something worse than Boko Haram is yet to come, and that there will be a spiritual revolution that will rock Nigeria to its foundation, at the end of which a 'new nation' will emerge. He says the problem with Nigeria is a leadership problem, and that we are sitting upon a keg of gun-powder.
It would be recalled that Primate Olabayo was the one who once predicted that the late Nigerian Head of State, Umaru Yar' Adua had terminal illness. He is also known to have predicted that General Abdusallam Abubakar would be president after Abacha.

  • Okare Baba...'Aje bi ina'. Right on target...All korrect sir.
  • I totally agree with you, Your Grace..., But dis time I hope you miss target o...cos Naija does not need any doom right now. D suffer too much for awa people. Na good times we need, IJN...amen.
  • We kno say awa yeye leaders be 'jaguda baba ole'. But make you Men of God help us cast d evil spirit out of dem, instead of d entire Nigeria suffering for d evil of a few bastards. Case settled.



Saturday 29 June 2013

OBAMA PAYS TRIBUTE TO MANDELA.














Culled from Daily Mail.

The United States President, Obama is on a State visit to South Africa, and is paying tribute to critically-ill Nelson Mandela. Speaking in Pretoria today, at a conference with Jacob Zuma, president of South Africa, he said his thoughts and those of Americans and people all over the world are with Mandela, and his family. He plans to hold close-door meeting with the Mandela family, but there are no plans to visit him in hospital.

  • Nice wan...but why Zuma come dey smile like 'cheshire cat'? Like say na awa own very Suntai??? Na so you love Obama? Abi eem just dey pose for camera? 
  • Baba d Zuma...(4d baba ke)...dem say d guy na vroom vrooom when it comes to 'skirts'. Chai...na no non-sense man. At times when i see eem face sef  i no dey take d guy seriously. Anyway he must be sharp to be in dat position sha.
  • Obama..you don try bo...d man na all of us hero. May he (Mandela) live long (abi dat wan na waste of tok?).

CALIFORNIA WOMAN CUTS HER HUSBAND'S PENIS WITH 10-INCH KITCHEN KNIFE!!!






















Culled from Daily Mail.

The State of California has sentenced to 7 years to life in prison, Catherine Kieu, 50, for chopping off her husbands penis, and dumping it in a garbage disposal machine, mutilating the organ. She had refused to accept her husband's request for a divorce, but instead carried out the attack as a revenge. Reconstructive surgery was impossible, as doctors were unable to re-attach what was left of the penis. Kieu originally hails from war-torn Vietnam, and is said to have had a childhood mental problem.

  • O Boyyy. Nawa o. I never hear dis before o. But sha I hear where woman take teeth bite blokos commot...neat... bcos she vex say d man dey cut show. 
  • But why dis vietnam woman no kuku fry d tin chop? lol.
  • Which kain vex fit make woman do dis crazy tin for eem husband. 
  • Fellow men..please make una dey wear tight 'putu', 'pata' (pant) for kitchen o...bcos knife full kitchen yanfun yanfun, and anytin can happen...prick no get insurance o.... if dem no use knife, dem fit take teeth bite am commot patapata. Dat na woman pawa for you.

ASHIRU SAYS 'NO' TO HOMOSEXUALS, AND 'YES' TO DEATH PENALTY.
















The Nigerian Minister of Foreign Affairs, Ambassador Olugbenga Ashiru, has rejected the United Nations Human Rights Council's recommendation on same-sex marriage, and the abolition of death penalty in Nigeria. He said same-sex marriage is alien to our culture, and can therefore not be imposed on Nigeria by external forces, and that we must defend our Constitution and not shy away from what we know is right for us as a nation. As for the death penalty, he claimed that our present Criminal Code was handed over to us by the colonial masters, and thus they should take responsibility if anything is wrong with same.

  • Korrect man...I don tok am say education is 'ga ju' (good). D guy has simply put the 'foreign forces' in their position with two simple sentences.
  • Fellow Nigerians...I ask you once more....'Who d hell is Britikoko, Amerikoko, abi United Nations to tell us what is best for us'. If to dey 'do furo' (homo) is good for dem, why must it be good for us? Na so bible, or common sense tok am say make man dey 4uk shit-hole? Ennn? Which kain nonesense be dat. I wan vomit sef, as I dey tok am.
  • Tank you Ashiru...D time wey ee suit dem to impose death penalty on poor Nigerians dey no vex for dat time. Have we ever told dem what to do, or how to run their lives? Forgetiii. I tok am before say it  is as good as signed. Saaam. No 'ojoro' for dis wan.
  • One time dey wey i tell my oyinbo friends say, in 20yrs time, men and animals (dogs and cats) go dey celebrate holy matrimony for Europe and Amerikoko. Dem laugh. But make una go right am down. D time dey come.

Friday 28 June 2013

CHIDOKA GETS TOUGH ON ROAD SAFETY LAWS.























The Corp Marshall of the FRSC, Osita Chidoka, in a bid to ensure road safety, said in a Conference in Abuja, that henceforth, the use of telephone while driving will fetch you a jail term, as opposed to the usual fine. This will also apply to over-speeding, over-loading, and dangerous over-taking. He further said that commercial vehicles should now fit speed limit devices on their vehicles to stop them exceeding the 100km per hour-mark speed-limit.

  • Osita...welcome to my world. Before now I used to wonder what you were getting paid for. What about those who drink and drive..nko?
  • Na so so chop chop your boys on the streets dey chop. On the other hand, I hope dis will not heighten their choppies level. Na d ordinary naijaman go suffer, parting with more naira on daily basis.
  • Would be nice if all could play by the rules. After all una no dey see wettin dem dey do for abroad? Mumu people..just dey kill una selves like fowl everyday. 
  • D problem is likely to be those insane commercial drivers. Some of dem should be confined to d asylum.

RACIAL ABUSE OF A 7-YEAR OLD MIXED-RACE GIRL IN LIVERPOOL, UK.
















A seven-year old mixed-race British girl was racially abused and humiliated by 14 white racist far-right, National Front members when she accidentally stumbled into their meeting in a Public Hall. She had gone to inspect a hall her parents were planning to hire for a wedding reception. The 14 white racist men screamed racial abuse at her, and made monkey noises. They shouted, 'Fuck off back to where you come from...'. The girl in question has a father from Sierra-Leone, and a white mother. It happened in Wavertree, Liverpool, and Police is investigating the matter.

  • Nawa o...wonders never end. In dis 21st century Britain!!!
  • As a matter of fact, racial abuse incidents don dey increase for Britikoko now o...so make Naija people dey watch dem back. D people don dey frustrated, so na blackman dem dey misdirect d anger go meet.
  • My own be say, pikin wey say eem mama no go sleep...him sef no go take eye touch sleep..abi? Make dem continue. Na jeje my fore fathers siddon for dem farm and village for Africa before dem come carry slaves....awoof.  D tin don come hook dem for neck now.
  • D fact be say oyinbo wey no like me dey make me laugh...bcos wettin make am feel say me sef love am too much, ennn???
  • Anyway sha no be all oyinbo dey like dis...na only small few dey spoil d rest...na d bad eggs.
  • D wan wey dey pain me be say when dem come Africa na so so enjoyment for dem. Awa people dey welcome dem well well.

TINUBU'S DAUGHTER IS NEW 'IYA OLOJA OF LAGOS'.






















Mrs Folashade Tinubu-Ojo, daughter of the former Governor of Lagos State, Ahmed Bola Tinubu, has been made to succeed her grandmother, Alhaja Abibat Mogaji as the President-General of the Nigerian Market Womens' Association. She has been officially endorsed by the Oba of Lagos, Oba Rilwan Akiolu, amid controversy. At the traditional rites ceremony, Folashade claimed that it should not be a challenge, as she had been working very closely with her late grandmother, who passed on 15 June, 2013.

  • Dis is raw show of power, otherwise known as 'Pasia'. How on earth should a lady as young as dis be d head of all market women in Lagos...all those ogbologbo women?
  • Tinubu will stop at nothing to annex d whole of Lagos under his family. Even sef Fashola don giv up, and chill out. I remember when Fash first got there, he was making gra-gra to object to d corrupt practices he met on ground. But to awa surprise, within a short time, d guy just chill like ice water...look the other way. I sure say dem call am tell am say make ee sima down if he no want wahala. Dat is awa Nigeria. People of conscience all have a price tag...courtesy of dat devil called IBB.
  • Dem say when 'guluso' (type of insect) wan bury himself, ee go dey dig ground, dey dance at d same time. We shall see. Ee be like say when people grab pawa for dat awa Nigeria, dem no dey respect God again, not to talk of fellow human beings.

GENERAL JERRY USENI FINALLY ON TRIAL.






















General Jeremiah Useni (popolarly known as Jerry Boy), one time Abacha henchman, and Minister of the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja, is finally facing trial for graft before the Code of Conduct Bureau, on charges of  abuse of office, and non-declaration of assets. He is also said to have used his position to acquire numerous properties in choice locations in Abuja. He was first docked thirteen years ago for the same charges, but for some obscure reason, nothing happened.

  • Make una dey play Abakadabra there. Is it hard to establish a case against this 4kin guy?
  • Dis na Abacha henchman wey dem take all awa national treasury take 4uk ashawo girls imported from India. Sebi na for on top 4uk Abacha himsef take quench? Na Jerry Boy dey supply all d shara girls. 
  • It goes to show dat no position is permanent. A lesson for awa stupid leaders.

$27 MILLION DISAPPEARS FROM NIGERIAN EMBASSY IN USA.
















The Senate in Nigeria is investigating how $27 million, proceeds of sales from Nigerian Federal Government properties in the USA, disappeared. The sales were conducted between 2004-2007. The petition that spurred this investigation came from TNM (Transform Nigeria Movement), signed by one Mr. Daniel Elombah.
The Senate has summoned the former US Ambassador, George Ibiozor, Nigeria's Permanent UN Representative, Ambassador Joy Ogwu, and  Ambassador Adebowale Adefuye for questioning.

  • Yawa go soon gassss o. Some people are shitting bricks right now.
  • If person wan chop sef...you leave naira, go dey chop dollar. Dat wan na 'advance level choppies' (ALC).
  • There should be a better standard of accountability. How can we in 2013 be investigating 27million wey disappear for 2004. Dem take juju chop am? Ee be like say awa leaders dey craze...walahi. 27million, na small money???
  • Meanwhile some nigerians dey for dat same USA wey don go grey from slugging and struggling to make a living, and make ends meet. If dat money was used as a pool of loan or scholarship funds for Nigerians in USA, wont dey be eternally grateful, and proud to be Nigerians???. I ask una.


GOVERNOR FASHOLA CELEBRATES 50.






















Governor Fashola of Lagos state celebrated his 50th Birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

  • But Oga Fash, why you come look like say you be 60??? Abi na too much 'ego' dey make big man age. Dis na wettin dem dey call 'big man big trouble'.
  • As for me o...if to say I dey your position, na 'ayonge' and 'gbaladun' I for dey. I be tink say all d chop wey una dey chop is supposed to buy comfort and reduce stress...no be so? Abi d tin dey add to stress level sef? I wouldnt know until i get there!!!
  • Anyway you only have one life...so make you take am easy o.

LAGOS STATE DISCOVERS OIL!!!















The Commercial City of Lagos is about to discover oil, and join the league of oil-producing States in Nigeria. There has been evidence of commercial quantities of crude oil along the coastal off shore Dahomey Basin of Lagos. This was announced yesterday by Afren Plc, and its partners, Lekoil Ltd, through the London Stock Exchange. This discovery is however subject to authentication by the Department of Petroleum Resources (DPR), the result of which is expected in 14 days time. If positive, Lagos will become the 11th oil-producing State in Nigeria, following Anambra State.

  • Korrect!!! God is abundantly blessing awa Nigeria. Na we no fear God.
  • Some countries no get petroleum, and yet all their citizens dey chop well well. Awa own na poverty upon poverty, despite plenty money.
  • I hope dis discovery will be a blessing, and not further punishment.
  • As for me, I go 'full ground' for Lagos gidigba well well. Fashola...I dey your side o. No forget me o. Bcos when ee come now, na only big man go dey chop, vomit for body.

ABACHA LOOTED MILLIONS, YET TO BE RECOVERED!!!

















The Attorney General of the Federation, Mohammed Adoke (SAN), said yesterday, that there is an outstanding 175 million Euros looted by the former dictator, General Sani Abacha, yet to be recovered from Europe, where it was stashed away. It would be recalled that in 2011, the Island of Jersey, successfully refunded the sum of £22.5 million recovered from an Abacha associate, Raj Arjandes Bhojwani, an Indian national. The 175 Euros to be recovered was recently confiscated by the Supreme Court of Liechtenstein, and had been laundered by the late General's family.

  • Chop chop incorporated!!! See him worwor face sef. No wonder him family tanda for wan corner dey chill out.
  • Dis kain money go fit feed d whole Nigeria, (especially d sufa head people for North), and even neighbouring Benin Republic sef.
  • Dis is a sin, not only against Nigerians, but against Humanity. If na me be him pikins, I go change my name.
  • Na real 'abasha' (mess) d man commit before he die. When malam finish, dem go open their guoro mouth dey tok say dem wan return to pawa. Wettin people like abacha do for una? Absolutely nothing. So so poverty naim him people dey for North. Dem wan return to pauperize Nigerians over and over again. My friend...no show for una until 2025....gaskiya.

GBENGA DANIEL, SUSPENDED FROM PDP.





















The Peoples Democratic Party PDP, Ward 12, Sagamu Local Government, Ogun State Senatorial District, has suspended the ex-Governor of Ogun State, Otunba Gbenga Daniel, and 12 others from the Party, for alleged anti-party activities. Daniel is alleged to be financing the Labour Party on the side.

  • Original 'political prostitute'. See him eyes sef like dat of ashawo.
  • Dis man is confused. Efcc dey pursue am for d chop wey he chop before, wey don hook am for throat. Yet he still wan chop more. Dis na unrepentant 'chopper'.
  • How can anyone in his right mind sponsor another party, when you are still in one. In fact I hear say he belongs to 3 parties sef.
  • Fellow Nigerians...dis na ex-governor for dat matter. Goes to show dat dis awa yeye 'leaders' no get awa interest for mind. Dem just dey position demselves for whichever is best for their pockets.
  • Even sef I hear say d bobo mansion for South London almost big reach dat of Oueen Elizabeth sef.
  • Chop chop Baba!!!

Thursday 27 June 2013

NNPC PIPELINE EXPLODES IN LAGOS.













Vandals have ruptured an oil pipeline belonging to the Nigerian Nation Petroleum Corporation in the Akinbo Island area of Lagos State. At about midnight, the criminals sneaked into the Jetty in three barges and canoes, and proceeded to siphon thousands of litres of petrol into numerous jerry cans. The explosion happened at about 4.30 am in the morning, after several hours of unhindered operation, and despite the fact that a security post is located only 200 metres from the position. It is said that petrol is usually pumped at the rate of 600 cubic metres per hour from this location to the Mosimi Depot.

  • No smoke without faya. Make una go ask d security men there...dey sabi everytin. Na dem facilitate the whole show. No be Naija we dey?
  • Too much hunger no dey let some people see road. As dem dey die die everyday...naim others dey still dey siphon illegally. 
  • Government must wake up, and intensify security along dis pipelines.
  •  Even sef if you see some of dis pipelines you go laugh. I once buy land for Ijoko area of Lagos State...naim omonile come tell me say na petroleum pipe i dey see so, wey just pass near my land. (Se me, i be mumu). I be tink say na water pipe. Na so i open my mouth. O boy...na sell I quickly sell d land shortly afterwards o. Don't joke o. Person go see faya..u no go run? But some mumu people like to play with faya. So faya go burn dem..abi? God no vex.

WORK BEGINS ON THE 2ND NIGER BRIDGE IN JULY.
















The Public Relations Manager of Julius Berger PLC, Mr. Clement Iloba, yesterday said that work shall commence on the 2nd Niger Bridge in July, and will complete in four years. It would be recalled that the Federal Government recently gave the company a letter of intent to commence work on the bridge. This news comes as a relief to the millions of travelers who often have to painfully commute between the South and the East, most especially during Christmas seasons.

  • Hurray...my inlaws must to celebrate dis o. Una no go dey sleep for on top bridge again for inside 'go slow', come Xmas time. Me sef go dey come blow 'ego' for una side at Xmas from now on... I be dey dodge am before, bcos of dat insane go slow. My own enjoyment never reach dat level...abeg.
  • Well, make Berger make sure say four years na four years o. On the other hand, dat gives me time to save my ego. lol. Ah..Igbo man...una too like to celebrate 'home reunion'..no be small.

BOKO HARAM TERRORIST SAYS HE KILLED 23 PEOPLE IN 2 DAYS.














A Boko Haram terrorist arrested in the Barkin Borehole area of Ngomari Ward, Borno State, confessed to killing 23 innocent people in two days. He was arrested on his way to fetch water by the local Vigilante Group, simply wearing jeans and vest. He had relocated to a one-room apartment in the area only a year ago, intent on killing people. His victims included a Village Head, and several Police Officers. The arrest was made possible by his younger brother, who had earlier been arrested in a different location.

  • Nawa o..dis 'blood thirsty' people. Dis is absolute madness. Dis are d original scumbags.
  • Dem go soon turn their land into ghost town. 
  • Are we really in d same Nigeria??? Should we really belong to the same country??? Dis na serious questions...my people. Make we tok true, and stop scratching d surface.

JUNAID MUHAMMAD TAGS PATIENCE JONATHAN 'ILLITERATE'.

















Dr Jinaid Muhammad, Second Republic Lawmaker, has called the First Lady of Nigeria, Dame Patience Jonathan, an 'illiterate'. He says Rivers State is coming into limelight because of the irresponsible, unconstitutional, and bizarre illiterate action of the First Lady, who hails from the 'small island village of Okrika', and sees the whole of Rivers State as her personal property because her husband is Mr. President. He claims that through her influence, the Rivers State Commissioner of Police, and professional thugs are being hired to destabilize the Government of the State. Muhammad further stressed that Nigerians must stand firm against Jega's INEC, because he (Muhammad) has no confidence in the 2015 elections, more so because the present Chief of Army Staff, General Ihejerika is an Inlaw to Patience Jonathan.

  • Oga Kofessor, abi na Doctaa...I no kno say na so una dumb for head. Are you telling us to believe that because Ihejerika na Patience inlaw...naim be say election go flop? Well dis na 'crying wolf'. When it was mallam turn in government, even una houseboy (boyboy) sef dey enjoy power. So don't give me dat BS (bullshit).
  • D tin dey pain una like say dem cut una with knife. Make I tell you now...Ogbemudia don tok say Jonathan go finish him term. Den after dat na my inlaws...d Igbo people. So make malam go siddon for corner for now until we send for una....gaskiya...segobe.
  • Which wan concern you with Rivers problems sef? Which time u begin LOVE Niger Delta people like dat. My friend...go siddon. Na power dey hungry you. Make mallam go do 'day's job' for a change like d rest of us.
  • Na so so 'gomant' (government) malam dey look for. Una dey forbid to set up business like Igbo people??? Ah ah wettin sef. Monkey work..baboom dey chop. Na dat chop go kill una.
  • Even sef..if Patience na illiterate..so what?...na everybody must go school? At least she fine for face. Which school you yoursef go? Docta ko, docta ni.
  • Wettin Patience do sef..wey Mariam Abacha, abi Turai Ya' Adua no do worse???

BOKO-HARAM ATTACK POLICE IN GOMBE STATE.













Terrorists suspected to be Boko Haram have attacked and sacked a Police Station in Kumo, Akko Local Government area of Gombe State, early hours of this today. Police resisted fiercely, leaving an officer wounded, and a number of suspects dead.

  • Boko-Nonesense people..una don start? Enemies of progress.
  • Na police be una soft target. Make una go try army. Damboroba shege.
  • Why una nogo dey deal with police, when their IGs don chop all d money wey dem for take buy simple security cameras to monitor movements around police posts. etc etc. Oga Ringim don run go hide for London. Dat is the history of my people.

Wednesday 26 June 2013

MANDELA ON LIFE SUPPORT.






















South Africans are lining up with lit candles outside the hospital where former South African President, Nelson Mandela, is admitted. He is on life support machine. Jacob Zuma, the incumbent, has canceled his trip to Mozambique, where he was supposed to attend a summit on Infrastructure and Investment.

  • Our prayers go to you sir. May God grant you peace, and good health.
  • Time never reach sir. Make you no try am o...unless you want make we cry. And awa tears go full bucket.


RATTAWU KICKS AGAINST SALE OF NATIONAL THEATRE.
















The Radio, Television, Theatre and Arts Workers Union of Nigeria (RATTAWU) have kicked against the proposed sale of the National Thearte, Iganmu, Lagos, by the Federal Government, and are asking the National Assembly to vote against it. They claim it is one of the remaining few national edifices that symbolize the Nigerian nationhood, and that our national unity will be threatened by the sale.

  • Una see say awa government people dey craze. Dem don sell everything finish. Remain make dem start to sell us Nigerians one by one to highest bidder.
  • Dis kain fine building wey we all have good memory of. D same way dem sell d whole government houses for VI, and Ikoy to demselves. Na d blood of poor dead Nigerians go haunt and kill una, IJN (In Jesus Name). AMEN.
  • One day una go sell una mama bcos of money (ego). 
  • Una no dey see hundred-year old buildings for Europe? How irresponsible can you be? I don tok am say some of you cannot manage your small families/household, and yet una dey control d whole nation. I shame for una. Wettin we wan tell awa children? Enn..tell me ...you moda4kas. God go punish una. Dis tin vex me too much...walahi. Na dis kain tin dey make person ask God at times say why he born me for dis hell dey call Nigeria.
  • I kno say Lagos Governor, Fashola, dey fight una make una no sell am...tank you bo. We support you.

SOUTH AFRICAN BUSINESSES ARE RIPPING OFF NIGERIANS IN NIGERIA!!!

















There is abundant evidence to show that South African Companies and Businesses have set up shops only to rip off Nigerians, in Nigeria. It is a sad tale of undue exploitation. The disparity in prices, price differentials, and quality of services especially in consumer products is glaringly clear, compared to what obtains in their own country. From Shoprite, to Chicken Republic, to Massmart (Game), Mr. Price, Woolworth, and Truworths, the story is the same. Our MTN charges are the highest rates in the world for cellular phone calls, and most of its employees are casual or temporary workers, denied any form of trade unionism. DSTV accounts for 90% of those that watch satellite TV in Nigeria. Despite this unnecessary flight of our capital, South Africa's population is only 50 million, compared to Nigeria's 170 million. Also the earning power of the average South African is more than four times that of his Nigerian counterpart.
From the foregoing, it is obvious that South Africa does not 'give a toss' about other African countries in business parlance/practices, as it viciously wades/barges its way through an expansionist policy designed to relegate all other countries on the African continent. However it is general knowledge that Nigeria's porous government policies have served to worsen this plight, and create the platform for this imperialism/modern day colonialism.

  • I shame sotay...I wan cry. How come awa government no kno say a leopard cannot change its skin colour. No be d same people wey use apartheid for black people? How dem wan change overnight?
  • D wan wey pain me pass be say, even Chinese people dey come Nigeria come yabb man...dem don colonize awa industries finish. And dem no even get beta standards like oyinbo companies. Chinko go fit sleep face-me-i-face-u...ee no worry...so long as money dey flow.
  • Dis tin calls for serious national night vigil o. Bcos even dis South Africans no kuku like us sef. If you see as dem dey treat Nigerians for their country, you go cry. Even sef for abroad like London, if you  meet dem, dem too dey jealous Nigerians. All na fear...'sherubawon'...You kno say Naijaman too open eye, and we dey scatter ground for anywhere we enter. Before you open your eye, Naijaman don commandeer their women sef. etc etc. Money nko? Even sef, as Naija dey blow money dey fear dem. You know say dem backward small. Ara oko people.
  • Well, make d mumu people for awa government wake up o..before South Africa start another apartheid for awa head.

SUNDAY OLISEH SAYS 'KESHI GOT IT WRONG'.

















Former Super Eagle's Defender, Sunday Oliseh, thinks there is no need crying over spilled milk, blaming Coach Steven Keshi for the recent failures. He says it is a shame that a team which only recently won the African Cup of Nations has already lost its core. Instead they are experimenting with players from the domestic league, and some unheralded players from obscure European Leagues. Oliseh, who once captained the Green Eagles himself, further stated that in view of the fact that the World Cup in Brazil is less than a year to come, this is the wrong time to experiment with new players.

  • You have spoken...dis na d voice of experience/wisdom.
  • Make una go behind and advise Keshi...sebi una be colleagues before before. Even sef, why una no tell am before he fielded the players.
  • If to say he succeeded, all of una go start to give am house and jeep, and sing his praises..abi?. 
  • Well sha, if una drive the guy commot now, i guess he has made enough money from the last African cup alone, enough to last him a lifetime.

INDISCRIMINATE ARRESTS OF NIGERIANS IN MALAYSIA.
















The Malaysian Police and Immigration Services have recently embarked upon the indiscriminate arrests of Nigerians, resident in Malaysia. It is reported that over the last weekend, a total of 60 Nigerians were rounded up, brutalized, and their properties destroyed. It would be recalled that this is not the first time on record such savagely act is happening.

  • God oooo!!! Wettin Naija do to deserve all dis insult? If na Britikoko or Amerikoko, i for understand.
  • Dem say when big problem nok man for ground, small wan go climb on top. Kai...see Malasia o. Ordinary Malasia for there dey deal with us. Wettin dem get???
  • Ok o..no be dem fault...once again na awa government I go blame. Since God in his infinite wisdom tok say na Nigeria dem go born me!!! I no vex.
  • Anyway make awa immigration and airport officials do wettin dem do for those yeye Kenyan people wey deport awa boys last time. Impound their plane, and detain their citizens too...abi? Do me, I do you....God no dey vex.


JTF RECOVERS BOKO HARAM'S ELECTRONIC GADGETS.















In a recent onslaught on a Boko Haram hide-out, the Joint Task Force has recovered and seized some vital recording/communications equipment used by the dreaded terrorists in shooting and posting online video messages. The group is said to be fleeing from arrests, but attempting to regroup in other locations.

  • Boko Nonsense people. Una no believe in Western education, but una sabi use Video and online communications gadgets. Deluded lots.
  • Ee no go beta for una...'ponri ponri iyalaya yin'.
  • One day na one day...una go chill.

KANO/LAGOS TRAIN CRASHES INTO TRUCK LOAD OF POOP!!!













Report has it that a train going from Kano to Lagos, 25 June, 2013, crashed into a truck load of human waste (excreta), which had broken down on the train track. The accident happened a few metres from Kakau Train Station, in Chikun Local Government of Kaduna State. The National Emergency Management Agency were at the scene to take charge of situation, and the injured were taken to Saint Gerald Catholic Hospital, Kakuri, Kaduna State. A company known as Ibe Nigeria Limited have claimed ownership of the 'Poop Vehicle'.

  • Dis wan is laughable. I dey LAUGH o. Dis na Nollywood movie ke!!!
  • Nawa o...wettin concern train with shit? Anyway 'shit' happens all the time in Nigeria...abi. Fela for like to take dis wan sing.
  • I wonder if the poop exploded....dat is 'nasty'.
  • Dis goes to show how irresponsible some of our drivers can be. I bet d idiot had ample time to have moved his shitty vehicle off d track. He probably left it there and walked away leisurely.
  • On the other hand we no kuku get korrect MOT for awa vehicles for Naija. Dats why 10 year old tokunbo vehicles dey perform better than 2year old brand new car for naija. Moreso awa bad roads go don dabaru all the alignment and ball-joints/shock absorber...gbogbo e, gbogbo e..
  • Once again I am blaming awa yeye leaders/politicians....By d way, una no dey see wettin dem dey do for abroad? Upon all d international travels wey una dey do, not to talk of medical check-ups wey una dey go do for Britikoko, Gamani, and Amerikoko. I hope oga Jonna dey hear me.





















Tuesday 25 June 2013

RUSSIA REFUTE CLAIMS OF SEX TRAFFICKING.
















The Russian Embassy in Nigeria has refuted claims by the Nigerian Ambassador to Russia, that not less than two hundred Nigerian girls are trafficked to Russia every month for prostitution. The Ambassador, Asam Asam, had alleged that visas were being granted, with reckless abandon, without any stringent measures in place to check unscrupulous and unsavoury characters. He cites this as one of the major challenges faced by the Nigerian Embassy in Russia.
However the Russian Embassy, on Monday, in Abuja insisted that they follow due process in the issue of visas.

  • Ok o!!! I spoke too soon. Oya make una defend una selves.
  • D fact be say toto na toto for everywhere...weda for inside heat o..abi inside snow for Russia. So why normal person go carry eem toto go Russia bcos ee dey look for action. Why not just go stand for Apo entrance for Abuja, where korrect Senators go faya you well well. At least dem go pay you for naira, instead of doing wahala to change Ruble everyday. 
  • Well I don tok my own o...your life dey your hand. Just make sure you no carry yamayama disease go back go Nigeria. Your loved ones dey wait you for house.
  • I shame for you o. But sha if you ask my opinion, I go say if person wan do ashewo proper, make ee kuku go Amerikoko, abi Britiko...instead of dey struggle with yeye Ruble..abi na rubbles sef... wey no carry weight. Ruble na money??? When people dey tok $ and £.
  • If after wettin I tok, you still continue to 4uk 'by-force-oyinbo people' for Russia, naim be say your own don kolo (spoil) finishhhhh...patapata.
  • Awa Ambassador sabi wettin ee dey tok. The Russian embassy for Abuja dey take style defend una bcos dem people dey enjoy cheap 'organic toto'...abi? Ok o!!!

FANI-KAYODE SAYS JONATHAN WILL SPLIT NIGERIA IF HE LOSES IN 2015.






















Chief Femi Fani-Kayode, the former minister of Aviation, has said that President Jonathan will split Nigeria if he loses in the 2015 General Election. He butressed his claim by saying that the President has already split the Nigeria Governors' Forum (NGF), where he is seen to be playing divide and rule. He warns Nigerians to prepare for the worst to come.

  • Mister man ....dont be funny. You sef na emergency politician. So wettin you dey preach?
  • See your mouth dey run like diaorhea, because you no dey for present government...abi? D time wey you dey OBJ Government dey chop, you no make noise. 
  • So my friend, just shut dat your big mouth..because dis na case of cooking pot wey dey call teapot black. Una don deceive Nigerians reach.
  • You and El Rufai na d same tin...suffering from 'lack of recognition syndrome'. No be d same PDP una dey before? Which party you come dey now? Una go dey change party like pant. Bottom line...na ego all of una dey look for.
  • Meanwhile...EFCC dey look for you. So go report yoursef.

SECURITY GUARD STEALS N12m FROM ATM BANK MACHINE.






















A security guard, Seyi Jaiyeoba, working for the First Bank Nig. PLC, Jibowu Branch, has been arraigned before an Ebute Metta Magistrates Court for allegedly breaking into the Bank's Automated Teller Machine, and stealing the sum of N12.6 million. The Branch Manager of the bank, Kayode Aiyewunmi, gave evidence before the court, claiming that the accused's monthly salary is merely N20,000. Jaiyeoba was caught in the middle of the night tampering with the CCTV Camera, and pilfering the money in bits, over a period of time. When his house was searched by police, they recovered the sum of N250,000, a new generator set, and a brand new Toyota Corolla car, among other things. He is said to be constructing a new building in his neighbourhood, near completion. He has confessed to the crime, and is known to be a member of the OPC (Odua People's Congress). The accused has been granted bail in sum of N1million, and case adjourned till 15 July, 2013.

  • Dis na d original 'Oyinoshi'...'Barawo'.
  • Dis guy na 'odaju/ogboju ole'. Ogbologbo ole...naija style.
  • How on earth did you plan to get away with dis? You no kno say bank money na '1234..no mistake'?. Abi u tink say calculator dey make mistake.
  • D guy na real 'guy man'. Ee look sotay..ee see say to carry drugs no easy. Even sef 419 no easy. He come decide to steal d money wey working people dey save. Dat na some people life savings o....walahi na God catch you....monkeyyyy!!!

CHRISTIAN CHUKWU SAYS SUPER EAGLES LACK EXPERIENCE.














Christian Chukwu, the former Super Eagles Coach has said that we lost the games because our boys lack the experience needed on such international platform. He said, 'It is better we fail and learn at this level than to disgrace ourselves at the World Cup next year'. Chukwu, a former player himself, was a defender in his playing days. He captained the Nigerian Team to its first win in the African Nations Cup.

  • Shukuuu  baba!!! Where have you been sir?
  • Abeg make una give Keshii all necessary support o..make we start dey wallop all dis football teams wey dey trash us like say we be ordinary school team. 
  • Also make una make am compulsory for awa boys to dey drink one bottle of milik every morning for camp...bcos some of dem no drink am when dem small. So dey need double doze...even sef 'drip'. Bcos dem lack iron and calcium small. Na so so eba and onugu soup, plus shakii and pomo we hear say dem dey chop, even when dem dey abroad dey play. Eee get as ee be o!!! Mr Shukuuu. Body no be dustbini o.
  • Shukuu..abeg make una no gree dem to replace Keshi with overseas coach o. Bcos notin wey oyinbo fit do wey we cannot do beta. Some people for government go try to take dat wan make money now. We sabi dem plan. So watch out o.

CARLOS ANCELOTTI IS NOW REAL MADRID MANAGER.






















The Spanish Club, Real Madrid, has appointed Carlos Ancelotti as its new manager. Laurent Blanc was appointed to succeed him at Paris St-Germain.

  • Nice wan!!! More money to be made.

NOLLYWOOD ACTRESS, RITA DOMINIC.






















Ladies And Gentlemen....Dis Is....RITA DOMINIC, a Nollywood Actress, showing off her 'assets'.

  • Nna...na real assets o. You no need to go to Hollywood to see 'd real tin' dis days. Awa Naija actresses don 'se corner'. Dem no be soft meat o. Dem fit make grown man 'piss' for body sef. Walahi Talahi!!!
  • My God??? If to say I get money......chei chei chei!!! Wettin I for do? Well sha...money yaab man.!!! Das why I no blame dis awa randy senators o. D temptation too mushhhhh. Ah ah...body no be faya wood ke.

EDO STATE HANGS FOUR DEATH ROW INMATES.























The Edo State Government has hanged four death row prisoners, despite pending appeals on their cases, to the dismay of Civil Rights, and International Communities. The governor of Edo State, Comrade Adam Oshiomhole, signed the death warrant of Chima Ejiofor, Daniel Nsofor, Osarenwinde Aiguokhan, and Richard Igagu.

  • Bayi bayi...You kill by d sword...you die by d sword. 
  • Oyinbo tok say dis na barbaric behaviour, but if dis bad boys kill your broda, rape your wife, sister and mama before your very eyes...you no go tok so o. So I rest my case.

BAN POLITICIANS ABOVE THE AGE OF 65.






















The Anglican Bishop of the Enugu Diocese, Rt. Rev. Emmanuel Chukuma has described the Chairman Board of Trustees of the PDP, Chief Tony Anenih, and the National Chairman, Alhaji Bamanga Tukur, as 'expired politicians'. He advised them to quit, as we cannot continue recycling people who should be in their villages resting, after having served their fatherland. He said they are clogs in the wheels of political progress in Nigeria, causing confusion and stagnating the polity!!!

  • Korrect daddy!!! God bless you, Your Eminence.....abi na 'Your Grace'.
  • Dey no dey shame. Dem go chop chop sotay, dem go hand over to their dullard children like say na dem get Nigeria. Blocking road for up-and-coming bright lads.
  • Please tell me...does Anenih or Bamanga know where to switch on a common computer??? D answer is 'No'. Dis archaic/antiquated lots are d ones determining our future in dis 21st century.
  • Henhenhen...Naija people...make we wake up o. My own children will not forgive me for not doing anything...dont know about you guys out there.
  • I will suggest that d man of God should go and see their respective Village Chiefs, and ask dem to 'call meeting for dem'. Dis no be laughing matter o. When dem call family/village meeting on top your head, naim be say wahala don come ke.

BOKO HARAM RESORT TO WEARING FEMALE CLOTHING.













Four Boko haram terrorists have been arrested in Gwange area of Maiduguri, Borno State for attempting to escape in female clothing known as 'hijab'. The dreaded Boko Haram terrorist sect have resorted to wearing female religious flowing gowns/outfits, in order to escape arrest, and hide their weapons. The local vigilante groups have recently brought this to the notice of the Task Force.

  • Boko-Nonsense people. Make una die one by one, make we get peace for nigeria.
  • Una no shame...dey dress like woman?? Dis was to be expected in any case. D moda4kas will pull any trick in the books to perpetrate their evil. 
  • Mumu people...una dey drive jeeps, dey wear oyinbo shirt and trouser, and yet una no like western education. Why una no use donkeys?
  • Even sef I blame awa army...dis kain simple job wey dem for do within one week, and wipe una out like mosquitoes...dem dey drag am. Well sha..All na chop chop tactics..so dat govt go disburse more funds for commander to chop...d type wey dem do for Liberia. Abi una no kno say some of us get inside info?

JULIUS BERGER TO START WORK ON 2ND NIGER BRIDGE.

















The Federal Government has issued Julius Berger a letter of intent, which would authorize them to start preliminary work on the building of the long-awaited 2nd Niger Bridge. This will include soil-testing, and engineering designs, according to Wolfgang Goetsch, the Managing Director of Julius Berger. According to him, it is to be built under the private public partnership agreement, and will be the first of its kind in Nigeria.
At its recent Annual General Meeting Julius Berger declared a profit before tax of  N12.34 billion for the year 2012, as opposed to the N9.93 billion recorded in the previous year. Profit after tax stood at N8.02 billion, as opposed to the previous N4.41 billion. Julius Berger is responsible for the Admiralty/Alexander Link Bridge in Lagos, and several mega projects in Akwa Ibom State.

  • Julius...d son of Berger...your own don beta. All d way from Germany, you come chop belle full for Nigeria.
  • Well I no blame you...We don try awa own people, and dem be so so wayo people. See wettin Bi Coutney do for Sagamu express road...na pure 419. Wale Babalakin na shot-cut man.
  • I trust Berger to deliver the goods, and spare awa eastern brodas (plus my inlaws) d agony/pain when flocking home at Xmas times. O boy..d tin no dey easy for dem o. Dem dey be like war refugees. At times people dey sleep for on top go-slow for niger bridge... enter Xmas day sef.
  • Kudos to Julius Berger. Na pa pa pa we want make una do d job o. Xmas don come finish.

KIDNAP SUSPECTS IN FAKE ARMY UNIFORMS.














Culled from Vanguard.

A nine-member kidnap syndicate responsible for the kidnap of the Ejigbo Local Government boss, Mr. Kehinde Bamigbetan, have been smashed by Lagos State Police. In a bid to arrest them at their Agbara, Ogun State hide-out, seven of them were killed in a gun battle. The group, based in Ghana, is led by one Jonah Benjamin Osinachi. They are said to have collected the sum of $100,000 for the release of the Local Government boss. An Indian national was rescued in the process, while several arms and ammunition were recovered. The dead leader of the group is known to be erecting a mighty mansion in Ghana.

  • See dem warwar, and evil faces. God go punish una...Una own don spoil.
  • Kudos to the Lagos State Police. Make una dey smash the moda4kas for us. 
  • Dis are d gutter snipes of awa land, making life difficult for the good struggling Nigerians.
  • Imagine the yeye guy dey build mansion for Ghana? Ennn...Na him dead body go occupy dat mansion now.
  • I hope the Nigerian Government will be astute enough to seize their assets, and improve on supporting the victims of kidnap...(Victimology). Jonathanni...abi una never read book reach dat level? Make you go look for Special Adviser wey sabi work o. No be just to arrest, and arrest be d solution o. Na d victims dey suffer pass.

Monday 24 June 2013

FEMI KUTI IN CENTRAL PARK, NEW YORK.

















Femi Kuti, son of Afro Beat legend, Fela Anikulapo Kuti, treated New Yorkers to his brand of Afro Music yesterday, 23 June 2013, at the Central Park, New York. Other artists included the Hip Hop singer called 'Common'.

  • Bobo Femo...ride on broda.
  • I hope say you slow d tempo small o, bcos some of us die-hard Fela guys no dey fit meet up with your beat at times. Eee dey too quick, like oyinbo beat...sometimes.
  • But I sure say you go scatter ground there, bcos na oyinbo people go full there.

ITS A KNOCK-OUT FOR NADAL!!!






















Raphael Nadal, two-time Wimbledon Champion, and World No. 5, was knocked out in the first round of the Wimbledon Tennis Championship Tournament today, 24 June. He lost to Belgian, Steve Darcis, who incidentally is ranked 135th in the world. The score was 7-6, 7-6, and 6-4.

  • O boy...everyday no be Christmas.
  • Make you allow another person make small money...ah ah wettin sef?
  • Das why you dey cry? Abeggiii....go siddon. See your neck like ostrich own.

ITALY'S FORMER PRIME MINISTER SENTENCED TO SEVEN YEARS.

















The flamboyant former Prime Minister of Italy has today, been convicted and sentenced to 7years in prison. Silvio Berlusconi was convicted in a sex-for-hire trial, after being accused of having sex with an under aged 17year-old Moroccan prostitute during his infamous 'bunga-bunga' parties held in his Villa. He was said to have attempted to use his position to cover up the case.  The 76year old Berlusconi has also been banned from holding any public office in Italy.
Both he and the girl at the centre of the scandal have denied having sex.

  • Berlustoto...abi na Berlusconi...What the hell is 'bunga-bunga'? Dat sounds really erotic and 'hard core'....and danger....rous.
  • Dis man na d real enjoyment guy. See eem face sef. Eee don patch am sotay, ee no wan old. Na so so 4uk 4uk ee dey. Ee no send anybody message o!!! 
  • All you politicians na d same. Dem even worse for awa own country. If you know wettin those awa senators dey do??? Their own pass bunga-bunga. Dem fit 4uk bottle.
  • Ee for good if to say we fit jail awa own politicians for Naija...naim be say House of Rep and Senate go empty...bcos all of dem go go jail, including d oga patapata for top. Dem middle name na TOTO.
  • Make we talk sense...how person pikin go go jail bcos of toto. Dat na curse o, my people.

IKUFORIJI, LAGOS SPEAKER, HAS BEEN RE-ARRAIGNED.






















The Lagos State Speaker of the House of Assembly, Adeyemi Ikuforiji, has been re-arraigned on a 54-count criminal charge of money laundering and corruption, along with his Personal Assistant, Oyebode Alade Atoyebi. His case was recently re-assigned to Justice Ibrahim Buba, following the retirement of Justice Okechucku Okeke, the former judge handling it. They have been accused of transacting business to the tune of N518million without going through any financial institutions between 2010 and 2011. The Speaker and his PA pleaded not guilty to all the charges.

  • Hmmmm? Ekun fun ra re.  For dat same Lagos State wey dem no let ordinary home owners, and struggling business people rest...so so tax tax. So na here awa money dey go. Well, over to you, Fashola....(Mr Clean guy)
  • Nawa for una o. All dis millions wey man dey hear say some people chop...and yet others no fit chop one single cup of garri per day.??? Why dem no go rob???
  • See d man cheeks as ee dey shine like color TV. I sure say eem belle go big well well...no be small? As I dey look eem eye, I dey see 'chop chop naira'. Dat smile sef dey tell us Lagosians say we be mugu.
  • Dis mata don drag too long o...make we kno weda ee go enter ground like Daniel and Dimeji mata...business as usual.

MUSIC STAR OLAMIDE PERFORMS ON STAGE IN SLIPPERS.
















The Nigerian music star, Olamide, was observed to have performed on stage in a pair of slippers, at Dbanj's DKM Concert. Meanwhile he is rumoured to be raking in a minimum of N10million a month.

  • Maybe dem be go wake am from sleep at the last minute to perform...abi wettin I go tok?
  • Abi d guy don see money yanfun yanfun sotay ee no get any sense of fashion again. You kno say too much ego dey fit craze person.
  • Next time please try respect your audience...at least. Too much guy no dey work, at times.

NIGERIA Vs CUBA (3-KONDO)


















Nigeria beats Cuba 3-0 in the FIFA Under 20 World Cup Football Match.

  • Now we are talking.
  • The future looks bright.
  • Abi wettin una tok?

IN JESUS NAME....AMEN.














Culled from Daily Mail.

This white-robed religious sect have been seen in woodlands behind some residential estates in Barnsley, Yorkshire, England, chanting and praying at 5.30am. Residents are still recovering from the 'stress and trauma' caused by their loud noises.

  • Dis na wettin we dey call, 'How Man Go Do'. Any way na way.
  • Hahahaha...Oyinbo, Oyioncha, Bature...where have you been? Dis is normal normal for Africa ke. Even sef mosque go do eem own.
  • The man in front is casting out d evil spirit bedeviling the people in the area, and must collect tithe on top. You are lucky he is not using loud-speaker sef.
  • Come o...some of una go sleep for Cell on charges of 'breaching public order'. Abi una tink say na Africa una dey? Where una dey turn residential areas into churches and mosques. 
  • Me I just dey LAUGH o. 
  • Oyinbo..u don 4get say na you bring christianity come Africa? So ayuaaa.

THE NIGERIAN COMMUNITY IN RUSSIA.























The Nigerian Community in Russia is reported to be waxing stronger under its present leadership.
It is said to be worthy of emulation. What is the secret?

  • Dem say una no dey hear word o!!!
  • Well sha...I happy for una, bcos people for Naija too dey fear Russia. Even sef when Amerikoko people hear RUSSS, before dem hear the remaining SIA...dem go don pik race. Eee come be like say when person hear dat name naim be say 'espionage' don full ground? 
  • But I also hear say una dey enjoy dat side sha. I trust Naija to 'survive', even for eskimo land (lol).
  • Good luck ma people. Make una try share una experiences for dis column now, so dat una go fit enlighten awa people small...bcos me sef dey fear dat una side o.
  • By d way dat una bobo presido...who short pass out of him and Oshiomhole sef??? D man eye too hard..no be small.

MANDELA STILL IN HOSPITAL.






















The South African President, Jacob Zuma, has said that former President, Nelson Mandela, is in a critical condition in hospital.
Mandela is 94 years old, and has been taken to a Pretoria Hospital for the third time this year, suffering from lung infection.

  • Nawa o..d man don try sef. Even oyinbo sef get 'RESPECT' for d baba. Dem bow.
  • So if he do 'peke' today, na celebration go end am. In Africa dat wan no be die. It is called 'passage'. 
  • God bless you sir...wettin your eye don see, your mouth no fit tok am finish. It is only between you and your God. You don try for blackman.